I'm sure we've all had our times when we feel at an all time low, some feel it more than others.
Right before school started, I admit I was at a low point in my life...
Even though I knew I had all those who loved me beside me, it felt as though that wasn't going to be enough. I felt like my whole world was beginning to collapse on me, and there was nothing I could do to prevent it.
While going through this I thought about possibilities as to why I could be so upset; everything in my life at that point was great, there wasn't one thing that stood out and said 'this is it, this is what's causing the emotions'.
One possible explanation was that I was just overreacting to everything.
Another explanation was that there really was nothing going on and I just wanted attention...(I highly doubt this one)
Or my emotions were really being caused by some subconscious thing in which I didn't know about.
And finally the other possibility was that I had depression...and though some believe that not to be the case, others believe it could've been.
I myself believe the depression one...otherwise, why would I be so upset for no apparent reason??
In my psychology class I've learned about 8 different perspectives explaining behavior, and after reviewing them in class, I relate to a big portion of it.
Sometimes I think that it was all in my head...like I thought I was depressed, so I acted like I was. Or I thought I should be or...just things like that (the mind is a weird thing). Main point it was all my mind, and it just had to do with my thinking; that's another way of I guess explaining my breakdown.
Yes you all read that last word right...I said 'breakdown' because I did indeed have one...in public, I just happened to hide when I was in tears. Why? Because I never want people to see me in tears because I'm emotionally unstable (I don't care if it's at like a movie or a graduation, or things like that).
But truthfully being in that state of mind...was horrible, it wasn't any fun...at all. During this period I did think about a lot of things...some good, most depressing; in one case I thought about something no one should EVER think about. I'm not going to say what that is...so don't ask. Please and Thank you.
But I would like you all to know that I am no longer in that dark hole...after a lot of thinking and talking and encouragement, I was able to bring myself to think more positively; which in turn led to be being more positive. And thanks to school I don't really have the time or energy to sit around and think about negative things, and I'm currently really enjoying my classes. They are a lot of work, and require a lot of effort to stay caught up, especially with my schedule, but I kinda like the busy environment. :)
So the current news flash on my life/emotions is that I am presently very content/comfortable with my life. My emotions are stable, in fact I've been in a very positive mood for awhile now....(well with the exception of Monday, but that was schedule crap that made me upset)and I have a feeling this happiness is going to last a while. :) As for my "depression" (whether I am partly depressed or not) I don't feel those same emotions currently, like I said before it's most likely due to my busy schedule and my attitude with everything right now. But I am very confident in myself that if I do have depression I can count on myself to snap out of it...or I guess...'heal' myself. The big lesson I've learned form this is that your emotions are definitely controlled by your thoughts (those in psychology should also know this), but it's completely true, how you think about something really affects how you feel/respond to it. So the next time you're down on something, take some time and really think over it, look at it from all different perspectives.
You are the only one who has the ability to control what you're thinking, and how you react to/view things. So take full advantage of that, it really can turn your life around and make all the difference.
